tips

When I was 16 years old, I was not exactly the happiest teenager out there. I had a deep self-esteem issue. My chin will be mopping the floor when I walk. I always felt inferior to my peers. I had an intense belief that I was not good enough.

Even at that tender age, I knew drastic measures needed to be taken to take myself out of the depths of my self imposed misery. I was my own prisoner.

I had a turbulence childhood. I had no best friend nor was I close to my family. There was no one else. I had such acute love and belonging needs that were not met.

I had to be my own coach or sink forever.

I did observe that I was always asking myself depressing questions that sank me to greater despair. My questions were always ‘why’. And the assumption underlying my questions was always that control of my life was not my own.

I was playing the victim.

And I was very good at it.

I was viciously repeating the soap opera in my head over and over again with my very negative self talk.

Sounds familiar?

As I grew older, I got curious about self help books. It was an ‘ah ha’ moment for me when I chanced upon a chapter on self talk. I finally got it. I was asking the wrong questions and phrasing it wrongly!

I stopped asking all the very lethal ‘why’ questions and started to ask ‘how’.

It steered my brain in a whole new direction.

When a ‘why’ question was necessary, I phrased it with care, with positive words and a clear focus.

And only if it served my higher purpose.

Today, it gives me so much joy to be able to help others do the same.

My experiences have shown me that

how you talk to yourself is a great influencer in

WHERE you are going and

WHO you become.

If I can do it, you can. And you must. 🙂

Namaste,

Joy

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Thanks for reading.

P.S. Have you downloaded my free life coaching app for you?

Please rate it if you can. Much thanks.

ON your Joylight! 🙂
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Need someone to talk to?
Seek clarity to your thoughts?
Refocus on your life goals?
Or to resolve a challenging issue in your life?

Contact me for a free 30 minutes session.
You are not alone.

The sky is only the beginning.

Email – me@joyleng.com

For more information on my background

For Our Children (FOC) initiative

The term ‘Neuro-Linguistic Programming’ is derived from

* Neurology (the mind and how we think)

* Linguistics (how we use language and how it affects us)

* Programming (how we sequence our actions to achieve our goals)

Source – squishymart

NLP Presupposition 1 –

The map IS the territory

While it is never completely accurate, it generally helps us to operate.

~ Are you having the best map possible to navigate life?

~ How can you improve on your map?

Source – manataka

NLP Presupposition 2 –

Having a choice is better than not having one.

~ Does your map of the world offers you the most number of choices?

Source – keepcalm-o-matic

NLP Presupposition 3 –

People make the best choice they can at the moment.

Even if the choice seems warped or strange, it was to them, the best way forward.

Source – marketingmasteryelite

NLP Presupposition 4 –

Everyone is working perfectly.

The techniques used may be ineffective or poorly executed but no one is wrong or broken.

~ Think of someone that you know who is adopting dis-empowering behaviour, which you know was learnt from the past, following the wrong model(s). Or could you have also experienced that personally?

NLP Presupposition 5 –

All actions have a purpose.

Our actions are never random even if we are not aware of it.

~ When was the one time when you did what you thought was random but on retrospective, you understood what was your intent?

Source – melanimarx

NLP Presupposition 6 –

Every behavior has a positive intention.

NLP distinguishes the intention from the action itself. A person does not equate to his/her behavior.

~ Consider an occasion when you had an intention but your action failed to convey the correct message.

Source – thirdeyeactivation

NLP Presupposition 7 –

The unconscious mind balances the conscious; it is not malicious.

The unconscious mind contains data that we do not require in the present moment but it is what we need to live in the balance.

~ Think of a time when you decided on a course of action but changed your mind because instinctively you felt otherwise. And it turned out to be the right decision.

Source – advice.milkround

NLP Presupposition 8-

The meaning of the communication is not just what you intended, but also the response you get.

~ Take responsibility for the communication. Remember when you point your finger at someone, your four other fingers are pointing at you.

Sources – riadreviews

NLP Presupposition 9 –

We already have all the resources we need or we can create them.

~ Think of an occasion when you thought there was no solution and yet you eventually did have or created one?

Source – operationmeditation

NLP Presupposition 10 –

Mind and body form a system.

They are different expressions of the one person.

~ Think of an occasion when an extreme feeling triggered certain reactions from your physical body.

Source – assets.coolhunting

NLP Presupposition 11 –

We process all information through our senses.

~ Consider an occasion when you stopped, listened to your senses and changed your course of action which gave you a better end result.

Source – moroccoworldnews

NLP Presupposition 12 –

Modeling successful performance leads to excellence.

~ Recall a learning journey you took where you modeled a successful teacher/practitioner and obtained similar results.

Source – solutiondesign

NLP Presupposition 13 –

If you want to understand, act.

The learning is in the doing.

~ What is the one thing that you always say ‘yes I know’ and you have yet to act on it?